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I came across this Turkey Trot pic in a local magazine the other day. Because I had run that race, I scanned the picture determining what part of the course was shown. Before long I was looking at runners’ form. I noticed the woman in the purple on the left and what nice ChiRunning form she had. A solid forefoot strike, upright posture, leaning slightly forward. Danny Dryer would be proud. I wondered if she’d started the race ahead or behind me, although the crowd around her looked fairly ‘serious’. How can one not be serious with a turkey hat on? Finally it dawned on me that the woman whose form I was admiring was me. Immediately after this revelation, I fought an impulse to be more critical of the image, in a bad way. But I stopped and let my first impressions stand. Being hyper-critical of myself is definitely something I need to work on.
I posted this pic on Instagram over the weekend. As you may know, I’ve made my way back to the land of heavy lifting over the past month or so. I post IG pics to help hold my feet to the fire and is this particular case, to give Living Proof Gear some love since they were so kind to donate that sweet tank to the Elf4Health Challenge. One of the comments I got puzzled me. She asked: “What was your start weight?”
At first I thought she wanted to know how heavy my first LIFT was. I sought the Caveman’s expert opinion:
Me: What was my start weight? Do you think she means on the Romanian Deadlift? Or the Bench Press?
Caveman: I think she’s talking about body weight.
Me: Bodyweight? But I’m not on a weightloss journey, just a strengthening, being-the-best-me one.
For the record, my start weight was 8lbs 14 oz at birth. All snarking aside, in a very dark chapter of my life, I ballooned up 35 lbs. grieving the loss of an infant. While the pain of that loss will never fully go away, I took the weight off 17 years ago and have maintained a healthy BMI (it wouldn’t break my heart if I dropped 5 or 10 lbs.) ever since. I didn’t mean to be rude, but I haven’t answered the Instagram question because, in a world where 100-lb. weightloss stories are a dime a dozen, part of me feels like I’m not 100-lbs. inspiring. I don’t think of myself as an ‘after’ but merely somebody on a journey, as we all are. I workout and eat reasonably healthy because of how it makes me feel and what my body can do (like run for an hour or 6 or lift refrigerators, or….ok you get what I mean). So I guess my answer to the start weight question is who cares? But the Romanian Deadlift is coming along nicely…
Are you your own worst critic? Are you inspired by weightloss success stories? Before and after pics?
I find the self hate in a lot of weight loss stories depressing. However, I do feel inspired by seeing how far individuals have come in their fitness.
I love this message. I’m starting to get pretty discourage with some of the messages being sent on IG and HLB blogs in general. It’s refreshing to have a very healthy perspective to read about!
I have lost nearly 100 lbs and I still look in the mirror and think I’m over-weight. Sigh. As a sidenote, am I following you on Instagram? I don’t think I am….I need to get on that.
That is so funny that the gal in the picture you were admiring is you! I love it.
I am with Miss Zippy I love the way you think. People get so hung up on body weight.
I don’t know that there really is a true after. I think it’s always a continuing journey whether you’re trying to lose weight or not really. And I honestly find it inspiring when anyone sticks with their healthy lifestyle – maintaining, losing, whatever. They’re out there doing it.
who cares what your start weight was… you look fabulous now though! i would probably comment back that you started at X lbs and climbed over X sets to finish at X lbs 😉
Aww! How fun that was YOU in the pic! And I am happy you didn’t criticize.
What a weird question to ask. I really hope that is NOT what they meant, because like you said, who gives a crap?! And I am sorry you had to go through losing an infant 🙁
Ha ha. I am NOT my own worst critic. Sometimes I need to be. I am way too kind to myself 🙂 And those before and afters don’t inspire me, but I am happy they do inspire others! 🙂
I don’t think it’s ever appropriate to ask questions like that. Yes I am definitely my own worst critic:/ I’m sorry for your loss and am inspired by your strength:)
I’m definitely my own worst critic. I say horrible things to myself in the mirror or looking at pictures – stuff I’d never say to anyone. It’s a habit I’ve been trying to break for years but haven’t been particularly successful so far.
Now I know what awesome running form looks like. I’m so glad that you were able to see all the wonderful things before you realized it was you.And I’m glad you’re able to keep it that way.
Don’t get me started on the weight loss thing. Although I totally let out a belly laugh when you said your birth weight. I don’t think it’s fair that the world doesn’t find normal weighted women on a journey of getting and staying fit inspirational. Why do we have to be Biggest Loser eligible to inspire others. You inspire me. You’ve come a long way since you were 8lb 14oz! 🙂
I agree with Amanda! Yes, I am my own worse critic but I’m working on it. BTW I love the lifting pics you’ve been posting – motivates me to get my butt into the gym 🙂
I love that you are lifting & love that you are the person running in the pic! 🙂
I do like weight loss stories but even more when they have kept it off a long time.
I get your comment on you are not a 100 pound weight loss BUT for me, losing about 40 pounds years ago & keeping it off 30 years thru hormones should be a story – OK I am bitching! 😉
It cracked me up that you were noticing your own picture without noticing it was you. And I’m definitely my own worst critic, though I’m working to reframe those thoughts.
While 100 lbs is an amazing number and a huge change, smaller losses are significant too. Having worked hard to drop about 20 lbs, I almost don’t recognize myself in the mirror. The thing I like about weight loss stories is when they show pictures (after pics) and tell height and weight. It’s so rare for women to say those numbers, unless they’re pretty small, so it gives me a better idea of what xx lbs looks like on someone my height.
Great message Marcia! I definitely get discouraged sometimes by the success stories.
First – I thought right away that was you!!!
I’m so glad that once you realize it really was you and started in on the critiquing, you were able to stop it!!!
People ask me all the time if I’m trying to lose weight because I work out “a bit.” NO!!! I know that I might have an extra few pounds (chalking it up to my love of wine!!!) but I also know how very much my body is capable of. Like you – I’m just trying to be the very best form of me that I can be.
I love the message of this post. We are all on some sort of journey – and don’t they always say that it’s about the journey, not the destination? Not some arbitrary number, but how we feel? I love this.
And I love that you’re lifting! It’s something I could stand to do more of, that’s for sure!
All the time, I try to help people – mostly women, I hate to say – battle the idea that they are ‘supposed’ to work down to a specific weight or size. It’s so hard because people get very emotional about that number.
I am glad you did not respond. Or if you do… just share your 1 Rep Max 😉
I am definitely my own worst critic – especially in running pics. When Denise sent me my Mile 25 pic the other day in Houston, I am proud to say I first noticed the huge smile on my face and realized that is what everyone would see and I posted it right up.
The lady in purple looks awesome to me.
Weight is a number and lower weights are not always healthy. I think some folks take the number as “success” when their health is at risk to keep it so low. I have noticed some “healthy living bloggers” seem to spread this negative message. I take my old eyes elsewhere!
funny, i can look at some pictures of myself and love them, and others absolutely hate them. I do track weight and weight loss, but what I weight will NEVER be on the internet or instagram. I want to be at the right BMI, feel good, exercise, etc and the rest should fall in place. I wasn’t at the right place a year ago and losing a few pounds really helped. But I don’t think seeing tons of posts about weight loss or pics on instagram is that inspiring…but that’s just me.