The first training run for the Marine Corps Marathon happened yesterday.
Source
Certain factors worked in my favor:
- It was a rare and fabulous 56 degrees at 5am when I got out.
- I had on my new Lulelemon crops with the lilting, seductive ruffle at the calf that produces a turbo boost when I most need it. At least I think they do…for $82 they should be able to run on their own.
- My inner badass was wide awake and chomping at the bit
Certain things were not in my favor:
- Mile repeats were on tap…not my favorite. Maybe even my least favorite.
- My inner suck monkey was also wide awake…holding court in my head and chattering away.
The convo in my head went something like this:
Monkey: “9:48 pace are you kidding me? You suck!”
Badass: “I’m warming up.”
Monkey: “I think your beloved Lulus are slipping down and your gut will be hanging out for all to see (the newspaper delivery guy)”
Badass: “I think your Lulus are sliding down and your gut is hanging out…it’s ok you have abs like Amy Hastings…alright you don’t….but who cares? Just pretend you do and keep going.”
Monkey: “Since this is your first training run, maybe you’re not fit enough to do all the repeats…”
Badass: “I’m doing them.”
Monkey: “You ate a crapton of cupcakes, cookies etc all weekend, maybe you should ease up before you get a cramp or something.”
Badass: “All the more reason to go harder.”
Cool down mile:
Monkey: “Go ahead and walk, you earned it.”
Badass: “Maybe some strides would be good.”
That’s how my first run went. A mental battle between badass and suck monkey. That monkey in my head is my biggest challenge.
Do you have an inner suck monkey? What does it say?
BAHAHAHAHA!!! This cracked me up – I am starting to think like this during my runs as well. I def. had it this AM during my tempo run and felt great for listening to BA monkey – or as I like to say my inner “BAMF” (bas @$$ mothereffer) 😉
I can’t wait to follow your training!!!
BAHAHAHAHA!!! This cracked me up – I am starting to think like this during my runs as well. I def. had it this AM during my tempo run and felt great for listening to BA monkey – or as I like to say my inner “BAMF” (bad @$$ mothereffer) 😉
I can’t wait to follow your training!!!
I like to listen to podcasts to drown out the monkey. It works if you turn the volume up enough.
ANNND I don’t know why that posted twice – sorry!
Ahhh, you made me smile today, lady! Love you!!
I do my mile repeats on the treadmill so that the suck monkey can’t enter yell at me about my pace…he just yells at me that I shouldn’t be hanging on the tippy edge of the treadmill, ready to fall off any second.
“enter”?? What the hell did I type that for?
Hahaha!! Love the lulu crops! I love that store but try to stay away as much as possible because I can go pretty crazy in there if you give me a credit card!!
Our inner suck monkeys should hang out together! Somewhere not in the vicinity of our runs. Please? Mine keeps pestering me.
Never knew that demon was named suck monkey. Thanks, now I know what to call him because he joins me FOR EVERY RUN!
Oh, yeah, I’ve got one. But all it takes is one good workout and I can squash it. Sounds like you did a great job of beating it. Well done.
OMG, that’s too funny. I love that you named the voices. Love the mental arguments.
I just had a conversation with my suckmonkey a couple of days ago. Sounds like Badass won out, great job!
Those suck monkeys are the worst – but glad to see the badass prevailed! And I love the crops!
Too funny.
My inner suck monkey is loud as can be, and my badass side is very nonconfrontational. It kind of agrees with SM and then keeps on doing whatever it’s doing.
This almost proves to me what I’ve always suspected – all of us runners have a little bipolar in us. How many times have I fought with that other little voice in my head?
I have a lazy monkey for sure. I have many dialogues with myself about getting out of bed, notching up the intensity etc. The lazy monkey says, “Why bother?” But he doesn’t usually win.
Way to tell the on key to shove it! 🙂
My inner monkey? Not even going there! Yeah, the Lulu’s help, don’t they? After realizing I was running in a $200 Lulu outfit, I figured it better have dang wings! The ruffles are cute…maybe I need a pair…I do have a new pair of shorts on their way though!
As always, this was hilarious! Hopefully you kill the monkey 🙂
damn, I hate that monkey. and he’s so freaking LOUD.
I hate when that happens, but this post was hilarious!
Your inner badass is awesome! I wish mine was that strong. Sadly, many runs I listen more to the monkey.