1. Tell your client the human body wasn’t cut out for whatever sport they do.
2. Give your client no feedback. Make them drag it out of you.
3. Start your appointment late on a regular basis.
4. Forget you’re in the midst of myofascial release because you’re distracted by a conversation about lunch possibilities, The Hills, tonight’s going-away party for so and so, etc.
5. Don’t count the reps. And if your client is counting his/her own reps, engage him/her in inane conversation to make that impossible.
6. When your client tells you something is too easy, ignore it. Or promise to adjust it next time and then forget.
7. Halfway through the appointment, tell your client you need to move onto your next patient and leave him/ her to do the remaining therapy supervised by the receptionist.
There, that should do it.
Yes, I’m cranky and I’m sure the fact that I haven’t run in so long I’ve blocked it out only fuels the fire. I know the hip glute/strengthening/rebalancing I’m doing is beneficial and maybe I’m not the perfect patient (ya think?), but after three weeks of PT, there is no love match.
It all came to a head last week when my therapist left me mid-session for another patient (for the third time). No offense to receptionists but I’m not paying $$$$$ for therapy from a receptionist.
The last straw came when she had me doing reverse lunges, 20 on each side, on a slick surface with my back foot on a towel. While I did them she told me how ‘flexible’ I was. Excuse me? Flexible? Me of petrified hamstrings? Seriously? Nothing could be farther from the truth. I was annoyed to say the least.
Later that day, seemingly out of nowhere but I know better (it was those damn reverse lunges) my left hip went into full revolt, this time with pain in the high hip flexor area. Pain that left me limping. Ergo no running last weekend.
Jury duty all this week so no PT. Plus I’m so disenchanted with my therapist, I will not return. I’m considering going back to my Sports Chiro, Dr. Miracle, who has worked his magic on more than one occasion. But I don’t want him kneading my butt.
It’s never easy is it? Sorry my comments have been sparse. Blame it on jury duty, which is fascinating but turns the rest of my life upside down. Back to the jury pool I go today, butt clenching all the way.
